How do you stop yourself from stressing out so much about stressing out because things have been uncertain lately? I’m beyond stressed at the moment. Not even the normal things that I like to do is helping. Everything feels like a chore, and so far today I have continued to treat everything like a chore. At the very least, my house is much cleaner than it has been in a while. I find that I do clean sometimes when I’m not feeling well. It sometimes exacerbates the pain, but when I realize that it means less work later on, the stress does lessen some but it’s still making me into a tight, raging ball of fire.
Moreover, I’ve started to realize that my crying fits are my way of catharsis. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, Catharsis can be defined as: “a purification or purgation that brings about spiritual renewal or release from tension” or “elimination of a complex by bringing it to consciousness and affording it expression” among a few other definitions. I’m releasing the negativity in order to bring about a sense of release from tension and giving it expression by my physical way of crying. And taking the time to write about it here on my blog. Purging of negative emotions is one of the things that I try to do regularly because I often feel too much. I find emotional regulation challenging with my host of mental illnesses.
The days when my anxiety and depression hit are some of the worst days imaginable when combined with stress and my ADHD. Everything seems bleak even through my prayers. But thinking of prayers reminds me that I can only keep going forward. In the meantime, I’ll continue to try to do what I normally like. Hopefully the comfort just rolls off of it and into me.